We are addicted to pain

We have seen everybody in a certain degree of stress and pain and hence we
believe that stress and mental pain are part and parcel of normal life always
and unavoidable and most people in spite of having everything also remain in
pain or unhappiness.
More than the unconscious state, people take pain as a normal state of mind;
to put it bluntly, many people even seek pain!!!
You may be taken aback!!!! Is it not? Is it true?
How can a normal person seek pain? All questions are relevant.  But it is a
fact!!! We have seen that the existence of the ego mind is a distinct entity
which is our driving force of our thoughts, feelings and behavior.  And its
basic nature is to create and live in pain, fear and sense of lack and its
variances.

From childhood, due to the particular circumstances and life experiences, we
experienced certain types or patterns of negative emotions in a prominent
way. For example, some might have frequently experienced neglect, hurt and
belittlement and resultant pain.

Repeated experiences of these patterns of emotions caused corresponding
energy deposits in the mind which forms part of the ego mind.  Though
rationality in him wants to avoid such situations causing pain, the ego mind
which survives and strengthens with frequently experienced negative
emotions, on the other hand, wants repeated experience of such emotions
periodically. Because the ego minds which is the driving force is stronger than
the rationality of true self.  The ego mind will cunningly create such situations
so that he is experiencing hurt, neglect or belittlement and recharge his ego
mind.  You might have observed many such situations and people remain in
pain without much justification and also not being aware of this fact. We have
seen certain   employees are frequently fired by bosses in an office or couples
fight at their homes in a particular manner with certain periodicity. Some
couples quarrel over the same issues or language or words or certain children
are naughty in a particular manner and scolded by teachers or parents
frequently. 
Intensity of want of pain again is directly proportional to the intensity of ego. 
For people with dense ego minds, this is manifested as a rigid addiction and
situations of causing pain is created frequently.
A lot of intense observation, introspection and meditation are required to
become aware of it.  This is the dark area of our mind which cannot be simply
removed or fought with suppressive measures; only intense light of awareness
and presence can melt it gradually in a permanent way.  Sometimes it is felt in
mild forms. When the mind cannot find a situation to experience these
patterns of emotional pain and recharge the ego mind, it will remember such
past incidents and ‘re-live’ in such situations    and  experience required
emotions to recharge the ego mind. Sometimes ego minds misunderstand /
misinterpret or doubt certain situations or persons so that negative emotions
required to re-charge the mind are generated; when this tendency is frequent
and intense it may develop into different forms of paranoia and abnormal state
of mind.    Sometimes we may feel mood off, sad, restless, depressed etc.,
without any reason when the recharging of the ego mind is due.  So
awareness of these states of mind and repeated and frequent close self
observation when such feeling or urge emerges meditation will work like the
melting of ice when sunlight falls on it.